And at 40 years old, I still find myself fighting the urge to get wrapped up in my parents’ issues. But the empath is fighting daily to regulate their emotions in an appropriate, healthy manner.Ī phone call from a family member giving me some bad news can bring me down for the week, even if the news doesn’t affect me. You go about your day unaffected by those around you. If you’re not an empath, you probably have no idea what I’m talking about. I have to constantly check myself, regroup, deep breathe, and remind myself that my family’s emotions don’t have to control mine. And that is the reason why being the family empath can feel like a curse. The problem is, the emotions I’m constantly regulating require fighting a battle with intense feelings not just daily, but sometimes, hourly. I’ve learned to try to detach from what they are feeling, so that I don’t feel it so intensely right along with them.
If one of my kids is slamming doors, screaming, or crying all day, it’s hard for me to hold it together, because suddenly, my mood is switched by their energy. It weighs me down for far longer than it should. Of course, we always feel sad and angry when our kids are struggling, but this goes beyond that. I want to take away their pain when they are sick, and I feel terrible for days after they have told me of a struggle with their friend. So I have to be mindful to not get sucked in by the wild emotions of the little people I live with. The responsibility of trying to balance the emotions of five different family members is overwhelming at best. I need time each day to recharge.īut the mom of the family doesn’t often get to escape, does she? Instead, she is the pivot point for all that happens in the family. Sometimes, I just need a freaking hour (or 12) when I don’t have to feel all the things. He’s a stubborn one, that youngest child of mine.Īs a result, the roller coaster of emotions that I’m absorbing on any given day is a lot to handle.
On any given day, I’ve got a tween who is moody, the middle child who is either full of anxiety or happy as a lark, and a preschooler who is making me smile and laugh one minute and wanting to scream “Why me?!” while shaking my fists in the air the next. I have three growing kids who are full of lots of emotions. I’ve finally learned to step back and analyze my emotions, find the source of the negativity, and do my best not to internalize the feelings and actions of others in an unhealthy way.īeing a mom and an empath is a serious balancing act. When things are moving along smoothly, I’m the most pleasant person to be around because I tend to absorb the positive energy and reflect that in my mood as well.īut when things go south, it sends me into a spiral of anxiety, and sometimes I can’t put my finger on why I’m in such a foul mood. When you’ve got good news, I’m over the moon happy for you. I am a good friend because I empathize with others’ problems easily. Now that I’m an adult, I realize that it’s important as the family empath to practice self-care and find ways to cope when there are negative emotions around you.Īnd of course, being an empath isn’t all bad.
Since I was just a kid at the time, I didn’t know what the heck an empath was. When they fought, I was an emotional mess. When they were stressed about financial obligations and marital problems, I was stressed too. But I’m trying to find ways to turn it around to my advantage, or at the very minimum, survive all these big emotions motherhood makes me feel.Īs a child, I remember internalizing a lot of the negative emotions that existed between my parents. It was a curse as a kid, and it is a curse as the mother of the family too. I feel both the good and the bad in extremes, and as a kid, I was often overwhelmed with the emotions I absorbed from my own family, which wasn’t always a place of peace and harmony.Ī few traits of empaths include being highly sensitive, needing alone time to recharge, being highly intuitive which sometimes results in giving too much of yourself, and most importantly, empaths absorb the emotions of other people. I realize now that I was trying to keep the peace to survive.Īs an adult, I’ve realized I’m an empath. I was also pegged as the peacemaker in the family. As a kid, I was labeled as being too sensitive.